Dumb blonde joke

Seeing as though I am a blonde myself, I feel it is ok to share this joke with you. Here, have a good laugh the expense of myself and dumb blondes everywhere.

Tom, a handsome dude, walked into a sports bar around 9:58 PM. He sat down next to a blonde at the bar and stared up at the TV. The 10:00 PM news was coming on. The news crew was covering a story of a man on a ledge of a large building preparing to jump. The blonde looked at Tom and said, "Do you think he'll jump?" Tom says, "You know, I bet he'll jump." The blonde replied, "Well, I bet he won't." Tom placed a $20 bill on the bar and said, "You're on!" Just as the blonde placed her money on the bar, the guy on the ledge did a swan dive off the building, falling to his death. The blonde was very upset, but willingly handed her $20 to Tom, saying, "Fair's fair. Here's your money." Tom replied, "I can't take your money, I saw this earlier on the 5 PM news and so I knew he would jump." The blond replied, "I did too but I didn't think he'd do it again."
Tom took the money.

Blowing off steam

I was feeling much more zen this afternoon. Tonight I am feeling angry. While I am extremely sympathetic to those who are suffering due to ongoing wars, I feel a sense of frustration. I have always tried to be a person with an open mind, willing to expand my boundaries and hear other viewpoints. But I've been reading shit lately that makes my blood boil.

Whenever there is a conflict between two or more countries it always seems to boil down to this: If the US tries to step in we are bastards of the world, arrogant as always, going where we have no business being. If the US stands back we are allowing the killing to go on, we have blood on our hands. What the fuck does the world want from us? We can't control every damn thing that goes on in the world. Really. We can barely keep up with the crap going on here.

Many piss on our culture, our country, our people. If you don't like us, fine. Don't wear our clothing, watch or listen to our entertainment, use our technology, take our medicines, walk on our soil, eat our food, interact with our people. I love my country and am proud to be an American. Despite what many foreigners seem to think of us, the majority of us are good, compassionate, hard-working people just trying to live our lives. We are not blood-thirsty, power-hungry xenophobes looking for genocide.

Our dumb-ass president has already gotten us into two wars. Tens of thousands of civilians in Afghanistan and Iraq have died and been injured. Thousands of our countrymen have died. Many more have been maimed and psychologically scarred for life. We have no business getting into another war. Our resources are already stretched quite thin.

I am all for the US government pressuring both sides to give up arms and begin talking to one another. But we are NOT responsible for what is going on. We did not start this particular war. If the world wants to point fingers for what's going down now, take a good long look at Hezbollah and Israel. No one else. Lebanon may be the innocent victim caught up in the crossfire but the US is not the one pulling the trigger.

Nobody Died When Clinton Lied

Lying, war-mongering, meglomaniac who is prime candidate for the antichrist. God help us.

10,000

Hey, I just looked and saw that I'm only a few short of 10,000 hits. To whomever is the one to be the grand number, please let me know who you are. It would make my day.

Fun from the news

WEST MILFORD, N.J. - A black bear picked the wrong yard for a jaunt, running into a territorial tabby who ran the furry beast up a tree — twice.

Jack, a 15-pound orange and white cat, keeps a close vigil on his property, often chasing small animals, but his owners and neighbors say his latest escapade was surprising.

"We used to joke, 'Jack's on duty,' never knowing he'd go after a bear," owner Donna Dickey told The Star-Ledger of Newark for Friday's editions.
Jack the cat chases black bear up tree


SANTA BARBARA, Calif. - A recently incarcerated inmate who claims she was unaware she was pregnant gave birth in her cell to a baby boy, authorities said Friday.

Leticia Cisneros, 35, was sitting on the toilet Wednesday, suffering from what she thought were cramps, when she gave birth, said a Sheriff's Department statement. Another inmate came to her aid and took the baby.Calif. inmate gives birth on the toilet
Personal inset here: I've had headaches that felt like tumors and sprains that felt like bone breaks but NEVER could I confuse childbirth with "cramps". Damn.

Personal inset here: And last but not least the horrendous crime of naked female breasts!!! AAAACCCKKK!!!!!!!Shameful evil disgraceful! We must be thankful that our caretakers know what we can handle seeing. I may have been scarred for life.

HOT SPRINGS, Ark. - A sheriff's deputy who is accused of going topless at a campground has been fired and charged with indecent exposure and disorderly conduct.

Dawn Rene Roberson, 38, of Royal, was fired Wednesday after she turned herself in on the misdemeanor charges.

According to incident reports, a marine patrol deputy and a park ranger told a topless Roberson to cover up in separate encounters Sunday.

Later, authorities received a complaint that a woman without a top was in view of children.Deputy fired for allegedly going topless

In the News

Damn! You Middle Eastern men just cannot be trusted to have any self control, can you? RIYADH, Saudi Arabia - King Abdullah has told Saudi editors to stop publishing pictures of women as they could make young men go astray, newspapers reported Tuesday.

Stay the hell away from water in Florida unless you have a death wish. Three fatal alligator attacks in one week...

Guess who's been sleeping in Mubarak's bed? CAIRO, Egypt - The son of Egyptian President Hosni Mubarak, who is widely seen as his father's heir-apparent, met secretly last week with top White House officials, including Vice President Dick Cheney, Al-Jazeera reported Monday.

The whole tooth

This afternoon I went to the dentist for the first time in thirteen years. Yes, 13. Yeah, I know but I haven't had dental insurance, that's why. I finally caved in and went because I have a wisdom tooth that HAS to be pulled and I couldn't take it anymore. I expected to hear that I had ten cavities or bad decay. Much to my surprise other than than damn wisdom tooth my teeth are fine. However one side of my jaw is longer than the other and the roof of my mouth is too high, crowding my nasal passages. The dentist recommends orthodontics for this, saying it will reduce my chances of future jaw trouble, make it easier to breathe through my nose as well as improving my jawline. It could also change the sound of my voice, although probably not dramatically. I'm going to be a 31 year old woman with a retainer. How sexy is that!?! Ladies, try not to be jealous. Fellas, remember I am spoken for.

O beautiful for spacious skies...

Ahhh...America. Several centuries ago people began to come and colonize in the hopes of having freedom that they did not know in their homelands. Such lovely idealistic dreams. Where do I go to find freedom that I don't know in my homeland?

America is the land of the free, UNLESS:
1. You want to have private phone calls
2. You want to smoke a cigarette in public
3. You want the right to disagree with your government without being labeled an enemy combatant
4. You want the government to keep out of your sex life
5. You want to be able to choose to die with dignity if you are terminally ill
6. You want to practice an non-Judeo-Christian religion without being hassled
7. You or your family is from the middle east or if you are Muslim...hell, even if you just LOOK like you are either

Just some thoughts

1. Humans should not be allowed to procreate until age 18. Then, before having children, they should be required to take at least 8 hours of parenting classes. I know it won't elimate all cases of child abuse and neglect but it might save a few kids.

2. If the US government and our president are doing what is best for our nation, then why do so many other countries want to kick our ass? Yes, I know it is always like that but it seems more so lately.

3. Why didn't anyone tell me that having kids would kill my sex life?

4. On a day when more of our fellow Americans have died in wars overseas, why is the big news of the day that some pop-tart "singer" is pregnant?

5. Do the fundamentalist, bible-thumpers even listen to the Vatican or is it selective deafness?

6. Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad makes the first official contact between Iran and the US since 1979. Wow.

My son

It seems my boy is finally turning the corner on whatever was making him so violently ill. It has been a hell of a few days. It started last Friday. Early on it appeared to be the normal flu but by the end of the day he was in really bad shape. He could not walk or even stand up. He was not able to get to the bathroom without being carried he was so weak. It was pretty frightening.

So Friday evening we took him to the clinic and they ran test after test after test and gave him IV fluids. He seemed to perk up a bit after that and started talking a bit again. Saturday he seemed more like himself, just tired. But then Sunday happened. He slept from 8pm Saturday night until 11:30am Sunday morning when I woke him. Again he could not get out of bed. At times he was too tired to speak. All day he drifted in and out of sleep. He would not eat. We only managed to get him to drink by telling him that if he didn't he would have to have another IV.

Yesterday he woke up on his own and asked for a drink right away. He was awake much more, although still tired. He ate bread and crackers and seemed to be improving again. I thought he would return to school today. After consideration his dad and I decided to keep him home one more day, just so he could rest. It's a good thing we did. He started vomiting again during lunch. We think it is probably because he woke up and ate yogurt before we could stop him and that his stomach just wasn't ready for it. This evening he seems fine. He ate toast and crackers, drank plenty of pedialyte solution.

I don't think there is anything worse for a mother than when one of her children are sick. I don't sleep well and in the back of my mind I am always worried about the worst case scenario. It was recently my birthday and Jd and I had been planning to go out and celebrate this weekend. Of course we stayed home with our son. Everyone kept saying, "What a shame. Not much of a birthday for you, not such a good way to celebrate." It's funny....that's not how I thought about it. I thought, "Thank goodness. This could have been so much worse. I could have spent my birthday in the hospital watching over my son."

The doctors never did come up with a diagnosis for him. Every test he had came back negative. They said it was a virus. That's what they always say when they don't know what it really was.

Thanks again for all of your thoughts and prayers. It meant so much to me. Thank you.

I want to give my sincerest thanks to those who sent good thoughts and prayers our way these past few days. Although we still have no answer for what happened to him it does appear that he is finally beginning to improve. Today he was able to eat a little and walk a bit, which was a huge improvement over yesterday. I'm sorry I can't give more details tonight but will as soon as I have a moment. I love you all. Thank you.

My son has become very very ill in the past twelve hours. Please send him all your good thoughts and prayers.

Update:
We've just returned from the clinic but we still don't know what is wrong with him. He became ill so quickly...He got an IV, two shots of antibotics, a belly x-ray, and a strep culture. The doctor did allow us to bring him home for the night but we will have to take him back in the morning. He is sleeping peacefully at the moment. I appreciate all your thoughts and prayers. He's only five years old.

Every American needs to know this information

I came across this, courtesy of John at Goose the Blog. SCARY!!! America, the land of the supposed free, built on democracy, on the belief that all are created equal is turning into a dictatorship. If we do not stand up and speak soon we will no longer have the right to do so. Our president apparently sees himself as some sort of a diety, above the rest of us, above the law. READ THIS ARTICLE! RAISE YOUR VOICE! Even if you are a supporter of THIS administration, just remember, you may not be of the next. If it starts here, it will only continue.

For my foreign friends unaware of the way American government works, let me give you a quick primer. It is based on three branches, one branch made up of representatives elected by the public, one is the executive power of the president, and one is the judical. All three are to share power equally, with no one controlling too much. It is to be balanced to keep corruption out. The Constitution is supposed to be the user's manual. Well, GW is taking it upon himself to interpret it as he sees fit, picking and choosing what he likes and what he doesn't like.

Bush challenges hundreds of laws
President cites powers of his office
By Charlie Savage, Globe Staff | April 30, 2006

WASHINGTON -- President Bush has quietly claimed the authority to disobey more than 750 laws enacted since he took office, asserting that he has the power to set aside any statute passed by Congress when it conflicts with his interpretation of the Constitution.

Among the laws Bush said he can ignore are military rules and regulations, affirmative-action provisions, requirements that Congress be told about immigration services problems, ''whistle-blower" protections for nuclear regulatory officials, and safeguards against political interference in federally funded research.

Far more than any predecessor, Bush has been aggressive about declaring his right to ignore vast swaths of laws -- many of which he says infringe on power he believes the Constitution assigns to him alone as the head of the executive branch or the commander in chief of the military.

Many legal scholars say they believe that Bush's theory about his own powers goes too far and that he is seizing for himself some of the law-making role of Congress and the Constitution-interpreting role of the courts.

Phillip Cooper, a Portland State University law professor who has studied the executive power claims Bush made during his first term, said Bush and his legal team have spent the past five years quietly working to concentrate ever more governmental power into the White House.

''There is no question that this administration has been involved in a very carefully thought-out, systematic process of expanding presidential power at the expense of the other branches of government," Cooper said. ''This is really big, very expansive, and very significant."

In October 2004, five months after the Abu Ghraib torture scandal in Iraq came to light, Congress passed a series of new rules and regulations for military prisons. Bush signed the provisions into law, then said he could ignore them all. One provision made clear that military lawyers can give their commanders independent advice on such issues as what would constitute torture. But Bush declared that military lawyers could not contradict his administration's lawyers.

...to the extent Bush is interpreting the Constitution in defiance of the Supreme Court's precedents, he threatens to ''overturn the existing structures of constitutional law."

A president who ignores the court, backed by a Congress that is unwilling to challenge him, Golove said, can make the Constitution simply ''disappear."


Now check this part out, my dear friends. The few who still support the train wreck that is GW's presidency say this...
Defenders say the fact that Bush is reserving the right to disobey the laws does not necessarily mean he has gone on to disobey them.

Many of the laws Bush has challenged involve national security, where it is almost impossible to verify what the government is doing. And since the disclosure of Bush's domestic spying program, many people have expressed alarm about his sweeping claims of the authority to violate laws.

And now this seemingly paradoxical event...In January, after the Globe first wrote about Bush's contention that he could disobey the torture ban, three Republicans who were the bill's principal sponsors in the Senate -- John McCain of Arizona, John W. Warner of Virginia, and Lindsey O. Graham of South Carolina -- all publicly rebuked the president.

And the final scariness...''There can't be judicial review if nobody knows about it," said Neil Kinkopf, a Georgia State law professor who was a Justice Department official in the Clinton administration. ''And if they avoid judicial review, they avoid having their constitutional theories rebuked."

Without court involvement, only Congress can check a president who goes too far. But Bush's fellow Republicans control both chambers, and they have shown limited interest in launching the kind of oversight that could damage their party.

''The president is daring Congress to act against his positions, and they're not taking action because they don't want to appear to be too critical of the president, given that their own fortunes are tied to his because they are all Republicans," said Jack Beermann, a Boston University law professor. ''Oversight gets much reduced in a situation where the president and Congress are controlled by the same party."

Bruce Fein, a deputy attorney general in the Reagan administration, said the American system of government relies upon the leaders of each branch ''to exercise some self-restraint." But Bush has declared himself the sole judge of his own powers, he said, and then ruled for himself every time.

''This is an attempt by the president to have the final word on his own constitutional powers, which eliminates the checks and balances that keep the country a democracy," Fein said. ''There is no way for an independent judiciary to check his assertions of power, and Congress isn't doing it, either. So this is moving us toward an unlimited executive power."

Lessons

What my kids have taught me:

1. Whenever you fall down get right back up, no matter how many times you fall. (Even though my daughter has been walking for nearly a year she still falls down a lot. Sometimes it seems her legs move faster than her body.)

2. You can get almost anything you want from life if you are persistant enough. For example, if Mom and Dad put a latch on a cupboard to keep you out, spend as much time as necessary trying different techniques to unhook it.

3. Don't let obstacles deter you. If there is a baby gate in your path get a chair and climb over it.

4. Don't be afraid to try something new. How do you know that clump of dirt or that dead leaf doesn't taste good unless you try it?

5. Think for yourself. Don't let Mom and Dad's repeated warnings that you will fall and be injured if you jump on the furniture stop you if that is truly what you desire to do.

6. Life is unfair. Someone will always have a slightly larger cookie or slice of pie than you. Go ahead and cry about it.

More humor--How Americans view the world

Shamelessly stolen from Xylocaine.

This chemical imbalance in my brain is making me crazy!

(I can't take credit for this--it's from the Onion, obviously. But I LOVE it! Damn, I just keep laughing...it's funnier each time I read it.)

Have you ever been standing in line at the bank for so long that you feel like you're going to explode—just completely flip out? Well, I'm the exact same way. Except it's not waiting in line that drives me utterly nuts. It's the undersupply of key brain-chemistry cofactors, like amino acids, that help transport neurotransmitter precursors into my blood-brain barrier.

That shit just makes me lose my fucking mind!

This recurring neurological obstruction of the natural flow of information to my frontal lobe's processing centers is so annoying that I can't even think straight. Sometimes just the thought of how little serotonin my brain is producing is enough to completely kill my appetite, sex drive, and ability to sleep at night. In fact, most of the time I'm so wound up by the constant barrage of disparate neural signals discharging through my body that I can hardly concentrate on everyday tasks, such as washing each glass in the house four times.

I swear to God, unless my corpus callosum starts regulating nerve traffic normally again, I'm going to go out of my gourd!

There's something about my brain's chemical imbalance that really gets under my skin. At least once a day, the constant, overwhelming sensations of dread and hopelessness aggravate me to the point where I want to jump out the window. Seriously, I could be all sunshine and roses, and the smallest fluctuation in brain chemistry will just completely sour my mood.

It seems like no matter what I try to do to distract myself, I can't get this chemical imbalance out of my head. It's always there, in the region of the brain that controls emotion and behavior, gnawing away at my cognitive reasoning and motor skills. The whole thing has been grating on my cerebral cortex's nerves for years now.

In my early 20s, these elevated levels of dynorphin were only a minor annoyance. But their prolonged deregulation of my system's energy production and decision-making aptitude has, over time, really started to take a toll on me. Maybe I'm just overreacting to my body's increased hypersensitivity, but frequently, when my synapses are firing erratically rather than in tandem, I feel like I'm about to spiral out of control.

Trust me, I wish the enlarged concentration of the toxic neurochemical melanocyte, among others, didn't bother me so much. I wish I could just ignore my brain's reduced availability of acetylcholine and carry on with my day as if the hampering of some of my central nervous system's most significant executive functions had never happened. Unfortunately, I'm not wired that way.

This insufferable chemical imbalance is, if nothing else, incredibly tiring; so entirely and devastatingly fatiguing that, even after sleeping for 17 hours straight, I still wake up exhausted.

It's strange, I used to be a pretty level-headed guy. There was a time when nothing in life could infuriate me enough to make me want to rip my hair out, hurl a stack of books across the living room, scream hysterically at innocent friends and family members, use a razor blade to secretly make tiny, shallow cuts in the back of my thigh, or kick a hole in the wall. What is it about these low levels of dopamine and norepinephrine that has got me so loopy?

I only hope that if I do as they say, maybe the voices—which up to this point have been nothing but trouble—will deliver on their promise and come up with an answer.

File this one under "DUH!!!"

Researcher: Premature Babies Feel Pain

LITTLE ROCK, Ark. - A researcher at Arkansas Children's Hospital has submitted findings of a study that suggests premature babies can consciously feel pain instead of reacting to it by reflex...The accepted theory is that premature babies react to pain through reflex, but do not actually perceive pain beyond their nerve fibers or spinal cord or in the highest sensory center of the brain, he said...Nurses from the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit then drew blood from the babies' veins, which resulted in an increase in blood flow to the sensory cortex. That increase suggested the babies felt pain at the highest sensory level of the brain, Anand said.

In defense of crazy old Pat...

The other day I received a comment from someone regarding my post about Pat Robertson's most recent comments about Islam. Pat says, and I quote, "The goal of Islam, ladies and gentlemen, whether you like it or not, is world domination...Islam is not a religion of peace...radical Muslims are satanic."

This is the comment posted:

And yet there are verses in the koran that explicitly command or condone violence and domination.
If Islam is so peaceful,why was there widespread rioting and killing because a Danish newspaper printed some inane cartoons?
Pat Robertson obviously does not always use tact or restraint when sharing his thoughts and opinions,but he understands history and current events better than most Americans.His ministry also helps a lot of needy people around the world,including the victims of Katrina and the Asian Tsunami.

By Anonymous

As I am no scholar in Islam there is not much I can say in rebuttal. However I would ask that the commentor specifically quote which passages he/she is referring to. And I invite my Muslim friends to respond to this.

My muse Pat

I knew it wouldn't take too long for something to pop up. Pat Robertson strikes again. The title of the article I'm linking to? "Robertson Finds Radical Muslims 'Satanic'". Some choice quotes from him?
"The goal of Islam, ladies and gentlemen, whether you like it or not, is world domination."

"Islam is not a religion of peace, and that radical Muslims are "satanic."

See now I just believe that the radicals are crazy. I certainly wouldn't go as far as satanic...lol.

Again his reps claim his statements were taken out of context. Yeah. Sure. Man, I'd love to get some of whatever he is on. It seems like it's pretty good stuff. What a lunatic.

Don't go quietly

This post from Mia regarding a young woman who was raped, tortured, and killed in NYC last Sunday morning has shaken me. It has also inspired me to post Safety Tips For Women swiped from here. If you are a woman please take the time to read this. If you know a woman please take the time to send her the link to either this post or the website I swiped it from.

"Tips on staying safe... for women"


The elbow is the strongest point on your body. If you are close enough to use it, do!

If you are ever thrown into the trunk of a car, kick out the back tail lights and stick your arm out the hole and start waving like crazy. The driver won't see you but everybody else will. This has saved lives.

The three reasons women are easy targets for random acts of violence are:

1) Lack of Awareness - You MUST know where you are & what's going on around you.

2) Body Language - Keep your head up, swing your arms, stand straight up.

3) Wrong Place, Wrong Time - DON'T walk alone in an alley, or drive in a bad neighborhood at night.

Women have a tendency to get into their cars after shopping, eating, working, etc., and just sit (doing their checkbook, or making a list, etc.) DON'T DO THIS! The predator will be watching you, and this is the perfect opportunity for him to get in the passenger side, put a gun to your head, and tell you where to go. AS SOON AS YOU GET INTO YOUR CAR, LOCK THE DOORS AND LEAVE.

A few notes about getting into your car in a parking lot, or parking garage: Be aware: look around you, look into your car, at the passenger side floor,and in the back seat. If you are parked next to a big van, enter your car from the passenger door. Most serial killers attack their victims by pulling them into their vans while the women are attempting to get into their cars. This is a good reason to park away from big vans.

Look at the car parked on the drivers side of your vehicle, and the passenger side. If a male is sitting alone in the seat nearest your car, you may want to walk back into the mall, or work, and get a guard/policeman towalk you backout. IT IS ALWAYS BETTER TO BE SAFE THAN SORRY. (Better paranoid than dead.)

ALWAYS take the elevator instead of the stairs. (Stairwells are horrible places to be alone and the perfect crime spot.) Do not get on an elevator if there is a weirdo already on there. (Of course bad men don't always look bad.) Do not stand back in the corners of the elevator. Be near the front, by the doors, ready to get off or on. If you get on the elevator on the 25th floor, and the Boogie Man gets on the 22nd, get off when he gets on. Don't ride the elevator with him if you are not comfortable.

If the predator has a gun and you are not under his control, ALWAYS RUN! Police only make 4 of 10 shots when they are in range of 3-9 feet. This is due to stress. The predator will only hit you (a running target) 4 in 100 times. And even then, it most likely WILL NOT be a vital organ. RUN!

As women, we are always trying to be sympathetic: STOP IT! It may get you raped, or killed. Ted Bundy, the serial killer, was a good looking,well-educated man, who ALWAYS played on the sympathies of unsuspecting women. He walked with a cane, or a limp, and often asked "for help" into his vehicle or with his vehicle, which is when he abducted his next victim.

Pat Malone told us the story of his daughter, who came out of the mall and was walking to her car when she noticed 2 older ladies in front of her. Then she saw a police car come towards her with officers who said hello. She also noticed that all 8 handicap spots in the area were empty. As she neared her car, she saw a man a few rows over calling to her for help. He wanted her to close his passenger side door. He was sitting in the driver's side, and said he was handicapped. He continued calling, until she turned and headed back to the mall, and then he began cursing at her. In the meantime, she wondered why he didn't ask the 2 older ladies, or the policeman for help, and why he was not parked in any of the empty handicap spots. As she got back to the mall, two male friends of hers were exiting, and as she told them the story, and turned to point at the car, the man was getting out of the back seat into the front, and the car sped away. DON'T GET CAUGHT IN THIS TRAP.

Tips to saving your life, if you have gotten into a violent situation:
REACT IMMEDIATELY - If he abducts you in a parking lot, and is taking you to an abandoned area, DON'T LET HIM GET YOU TO THAT AREA. If you are driving, react immediately in the situation, and crash your car while still going 5 mph. If he's driving, find the right time, and stick your fingers in his eyes. He must watch the road, so choose an unsuspecting time, and gouge him. It is your ONLY defense. While he is in shock, GET OUT. This sounds gross, but the alternative is worse if you do not act.

RESIST - Don't go along with him: Run, if you are able: DON'T EVER GIVE UP! You DO NOT want to get to a crime scene.

Always keep your distance when walking past strangers on the street or in dark areas.

GET A CELL PHONE: There are packages for $19.95 a month that allow you to program only 911 into the dialing out program. (This is an alternative for parents who say it is too expensive for their kids to have a cell phone.)

BREAK DOWNS: Make every effort to avoid this by ALWAYS keeping your carin good working order. If your car breaks down:

LOCK YOUR DOORS. You better have a cell phone to call for help. If you don't have a cell phone: (shame on you) keep a blanket, warm clothes, a pair of boots, and a flashlight in your car always, for emergencies.

If it's noon on a business day, you may want to put your hazards on and walk to safety. If it's 2 AM, put on your warm clothes, and walk to a lighted area. You are a perfect target if you are sitting in your car broken down. Predators search the highways for easy targets like you.

If you're on a desolate road: walk away from the car (in your warm clothes) and go to some bushes, or some area AWAY from your vehicles. It will be cold, and uncomfortable, but you DO NOT want to stay in your car, and there are no psycho bogeymen waiting in the bushes who knew you were going to break down there and then.

Physical defenses that we can use against the violent predator: The EYES are the most vulnerable part of the body. Poke him there HARD. It may be your only window of opportunity.

The neck is also a vulnerable spot, but you MUST know where to grip, AND HAVE THE STRENGTH to cut off his breath. Punch him in the throat to cut off his air supply.

The last place is the KNEES. Everyone's knees are very vulnerable, and a swift kick here will take anyone down. **** A cautionary note about these things. If you do not do these things right the first time, you are in trouble, because it will only anger the individual, and that anger will be TAKEN OUT ON YOU. I'm not saying don't attempt them, it may be your only hope, but be forceful when you do.

If you are walking alone in the dark (which you shouldn't be) and you find him following/chasing you: Scream "FIRE!" and not "help"; People don't want to get involved when people yell "help" but "fire" draws attention because people are nosy. RUN!

Find an obstacle, such as a parked car, and run around it, like Ring Around the Rosie. This may sound silly, but over the years, 5 women have told Pat Malone that this SAVED THEIR LIVES. Your last hope is getting under the car. Once you are under there, there are tons of things to hold onto, and he will not be able to get you out and will not come under for you (most likely). Usually they give up by this point. The catch here is that YOU MUST PRACTICE GETTING UNDER THE CAR. You must have a plan (he will have one); know if you will be going on your back, front, from the side or back of the car. It must be practiced.

Never let yourself or anyone that you know be the "closer" in any type of business (bar, store, restaurant, gas station). Pat knew Danielle, who was a girl that just died from being shot point blank by some kids while she was closing at the local gas station. He talked with her the night before she died, and asked whether it ever scared her to close alone. She said, "Yes, but I'll be allright, Pat. I'll be all right." She wasn't. Our world is not as safe as we pretend that it is, and living in our fantasy worlds WILL get us in trouble, sooner or later. Pat Malone said again and again that the women who die EVERY MINUTE from violent crimes expected to go to bed tonight, and get up tomorrow. No one expects it,but we must be prepared and aware so that we HAVE A PLAN. BE PREPARED TO ACT! AND ACT HARD! HAVE A PLAN!

I would encourage you to pass this on to all women, not just your friends and family, but everybody. We all need to hear it. For you and to share with your family, especially the women.